Five Ways to Encourage Teens’ Jewish Identities

Many Jewish teens leave home believing they've "finished" their Jewish education after their b'nei mitzvah or after confirmation. I certainly did. But that's like thinking you've mastered math because you learned multiplication tables.

There is so much more to discover about Jewish texts, history, culture, and philosophy once teens are old enough to make connections on their own terms. For me, that growth came in college. For others, it might happen through travel, summer programs, youth group retreats, or simply meeting Jews with different perspectives. Here are five ways you can help the teens in your life build a strong Jewish identity.

1. Normalize Questioning

Don't panic when teens challenge Jewish beliefs or practices. Instead, welcome their questions. Remember that rabbis have debated these issues for centuries. Doubt isn't the opposite of faith; it's often the beginning of deeper understanding.

2. Emphasize Jewish Diversity

Show teens that Judaism isn't one size fits all. Attend services at different synagogues; invite families from different backgrounds over for Shabbat dinner; and explore online communities representing different Jewish communities and traditions. Show them that being Jewish has many authentic expressions.

3. Show Them How Judaism Connects to Their Passions

Help teens find Jewish angles in things they're passionate about, whether that is music, sports, social justice, nature, or science. Talk about Jewish musicians, athletes who observe Shabbat, or organizations working to repair the world. When Judaism intersects with what teens already care about, it becomes personally meaningful. Want help making these connections? URJ specialty camps have blogs and other resources that can be a great starting point.

4. Encourage Teens to Make Jewish Friends

Teens' friends can shape their identity more than anything. Help them connect with NFTY, go to summer camp, or participate in programs where they'll meet Jewish peers. Sometimes the best Jewish education happens in late-night conversations with other Jewish teens.

5. Show Teens That Judaism is a Lifelong Journey

Show the teens in your life that you're still learning, too. Share articles or videos that challenge your thinking, say Kaddish or visit cemeteries, attend adult education classes, visit Jewish sites and communities when you travel, and discuss how current events relate to your Jewish values. When teens see the adults in their lives actively engaging with Judaism, they're more likely to see it as something worth pursuing.

These are just a few ways parents, educators, and communities can prepare teens to enter the ongoing conversation of Jewish life. By teaching them that Judaism is a living, evolving tradition that they can engage with beyond the synagogue walls, you are helping them discover what being Jewish means to them.